Thank You!
That’s me published as a journalist now. It may only be a wee fluffy beauty piece I did for a college project for The Scottish Sun but everyone’s got to start somewhere. If you’d have come to me 5 years ago and said “Emma, you’re going to be a published journalist and studying journalism at a HND level in a few years from now.” I’d have laughed in your face.
Because I’ve always had this gnawing self-doubt about myself lingering about the pit of my stomach, never thinking I’ll achieve anything. Not to get all self-analytical on you but I think that feeling stems from my childhood anxieties and bullying. Not even just that but over the past few years I’ve been in some of the darkest places in my life which have taken a massive mental toll on me so that doesn’t exactly boost my self-esteem and make me think I’m the bee’s knees does it?
I’d like to think that my wee mammy is looking down on me and is proud of her wee girl though because I don’t think I’d be the person I am today without her. Without her love and guidance, I wouldn’t be able to be as (somewhat) resilient, hardworking and passionate as I am. As we all do though I wonder about the what if’s, it’s human nature after all. What if my mum was still here to motivate and encourage me throughout my adult life? What more could I have achieved if I didn’t take that long break from my studies at the age of 17 to deal with her sudden passing? It’s at times like this I’d love to have a loan of Professor Farnsworth’s What-if Machine from Futurama to have a peek at what could have been but alas, life isn’t a cartoon and nothings as simple as just whipping up a fantastical machine to answer all your questions.
I also wouldn’t have gotten to this point without my partner in crime John. He’s been my rock from the day we met nearly 6 years ago, I genuinely don’t think I’d still be here without him and his absolute undying love and support of me. A lot of guys would run for the hills if their new girlfriend of 3 months mum passed away suddenly and they were left with a shattered person they had to put back together like Humpty Dumpty. But not John, he held me as I cried, wiped away my tears and was just there for me even if I was completely broken and for that I will never be able to thank him enough. He’s been my biggest supporter and never stops believing in me even when I don’t believe in myself. That man is the reason I’m doing what I love again after I was left traumatised and in the dark after the hardest time of my life, not only am I ever so grateful for that but I think my mum would be too.
Another of my biggest supporters is my best friend Chloe, what can I say? She’s helped me grow so much as a person as we’ve grown together from wee scene weans making bad life choices and even worse hair and eyebrow choices (what were we thinking?!) to young adults living in the real world and making serious life changing decisions, not about eyebrows this time thankfully. I support her and she supports me, I know at the end of the day she’ll always be one of my biggest fans and I hers. Like the time she performed her first live singing gig and I was right there at the front of the stage making a right fool of myself cheering her on in front of the rest of the pub or when she gave birth to my gorgeous nephew Kayden I was there the next day to see her and make sure she was okay and knew how happy for her I was and proud I was. Whenever I have a problem, I know I can always rely on Chlo to be there for me no matter how busy she is and when I do something I’m proud of I know she’s there right behind me cheering me on.
My family and friends are my driving force, I wouldn’t be here doing what I’m doing without the support of each and everyone of them. So rather than this post being super self-congratulatory I dedicate it to each and every member of my family and my close friends (you know who you all are). Thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything you have ever done to support me in getting me to the place I am now.
Seeing as I spoke about it though it would be a little rude not to share my piece from The Scottish Sun ;)
THING OF BEAUTY YouTuber Shane Dawson’s The Beautiful World of Jeffree Star series offers in-depth look at Conspiracy line’s creation
Because I’ve always had this gnawing self-doubt about myself lingering about the pit of my stomach, never thinking I’ll achieve anything. Not to get all self-analytical on you but I think that feeling stems from my childhood anxieties and bullying. Not even just that but over the past few years I’ve been in some of the darkest places in my life which have taken a massive mental toll on me so that doesn’t exactly boost my self-esteem and make me think I’m the bee’s knees does it?
I’d like to think that my wee mammy is looking down on me and is proud of her wee girl though because I don’t think I’d be the person I am today without her. Without her love and guidance, I wouldn’t be able to be as (somewhat) resilient, hardworking and passionate as I am. As we all do though I wonder about the what if’s, it’s human nature after all. What if my mum was still here to motivate and encourage me throughout my adult life? What more could I have achieved if I didn’t take that long break from my studies at the age of 17 to deal with her sudden passing? It’s at times like this I’d love to have a loan of Professor Farnsworth’s What-if Machine from Futurama to have a peek at what could have been but alas, life isn’t a cartoon and nothings as simple as just whipping up a fantastical machine to answer all your questions.
I also wouldn’t have gotten to this point without my partner in crime John. He’s been my rock from the day we met nearly 6 years ago, I genuinely don’t think I’d still be here without him and his absolute undying love and support of me. A lot of guys would run for the hills if their new girlfriend of 3 months mum passed away suddenly and they were left with a shattered person they had to put back together like Humpty Dumpty. But not John, he held me as I cried, wiped away my tears and was just there for me even if I was completely broken and for that I will never be able to thank him enough. He’s been my biggest supporter and never stops believing in me even when I don’t believe in myself. That man is the reason I’m doing what I love again after I was left traumatised and in the dark after the hardest time of my life, not only am I ever so grateful for that but I think my mum would be too.
Another of my biggest supporters is my best friend Chloe, what can I say? She’s helped me grow so much as a person as we’ve grown together from wee scene weans making bad life choices and even worse hair and eyebrow choices (what were we thinking?!) to young adults living in the real world and making serious life changing decisions, not about eyebrows this time thankfully. I support her and she supports me, I know at the end of the day she’ll always be one of my biggest fans and I hers. Like the time she performed her first live singing gig and I was right there at the front of the stage making a right fool of myself cheering her on in front of the rest of the pub or when she gave birth to my gorgeous nephew Kayden I was there the next day to see her and make sure she was okay and knew how happy for her I was and proud I was. Whenever I have a problem, I know I can always rely on Chlo to be there for me no matter how busy she is and when I do something I’m proud of I know she’s there right behind me cheering me on.
My family and friends are my driving force, I wouldn’t be here doing what I’m doing without the support of each and everyone of them. So rather than this post being super self-congratulatory I dedicate it to each and every member of my family and my close friends (you know who you all are). Thank you from the bottom of my heart for everything you have ever done to support me in getting me to the place I am now.
Seeing as I spoke about it though it would be a little rude not to share my piece from The Scottish Sun ;)
THING OF BEAUTY YouTuber Shane Dawson’s The Beautiful World of Jeffree Star series offers in-depth look at Conspiracy line’s creation
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